Friday 19 November 2010

Man's Head Explodes Whilst On Telephone To Virgin Media


A local man died while on the telephone to Virgin Media, a court heard today.

The post-mortem hearing concerned Clive Pheebs, 43, who was attempting to report a fault on the line of a number he was trying to reach, when the death occurred.

"Mr Pheebs had noticed after many unsuccessful attempts to dial an unspecified number, that there was a possible fault on the line," said Coroner Donald Brigstock, "he was sure it was not his line at fault, but that of the company he was attempting to contact, as he had successfully recieved and dialled several calls himself already that day."

"Upon finding a number for BT Fault Reporting, after an extensive internet search, a 10 minute battle with an automated system ensued, in which he had to choose which department he required, which number he was calling from, what he'd had for breakfast and which colour underpants he'd chosen that morning. He finally reached a vaguely human being."

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